This may be the hardest thing I've ever done

Hello all!
      I know I said in a previous post that I was going to write in this blog once a week, but I felt like sharing some of what I have figured out in the past few days: Going to college may just be the hardest thing I've ever done, and I'm a mom, so that's saying a lot. 
     I handed in an assignment on Tuesday (The end of our school week) and I know for a fact that I half-assed it. We had to write about everything we've learned so far in our research for this class. It was the week 4 assignment, so I had 4 weeks of research to use. The research was the easy part and it was through the research that I learned I couldn't stay with the same major unless I wanted to waste time and money on a useless degree. The hardest part was the writing of the assignment. We have to use APA format, which some of you may be familiar with, but as someone who hasn't been is school in 30 years and didn't finish high school, I honestly have no clue what this is and am having a hard time grasping it. I am reminded that one of the reasons I didn't finish school was because I never was able to get what was in my head on to the paper. I could explain verbally all day long and be articulate, but when it came to writing it down and making sense, I would go blank. I had one therapist tell me it was a different form of dyslexia, which is all well and good, but it didn't help me get the work done. I felt like a complete and utter failure, so when I got pregnant at 16, quitting school was the easiest decision in the world for me.  I honestly have no idea how I'm going to get through 4-6 years of this and make it out sane. I am on week 5 and it's just getting harder for me and I'm having to fight shutting down and blanking out. I read the descriptions of what we are to do each week for each class and am fine. I understand what they want and how they want it done, but then I go to write it, my mind just freaks out and goes blank or jumbles it all up.
     I know it is a work in progress, but I see my grades slipping and I can't get too far away from the 90th percentile and still hope to get a good internship and job out of this. I am going to do my best to stop all the distractions, tell my negative mind to shut the hell up and go about getting this done and in the way it is supposed to be.
     Thank you all who are reading along my journey and please know that I welcome any feedback you feel like giving, unless it's mean.

Until next time,
-Karen